蓝色的世界

在90年代初，人民的生活还是很贫乏的，每逢夜晚，看电视成了唯一选择，但那时，哪静的下心来看电视啊。

成年的我们身上有过剩的荷尔蒙，需要证明自己的逆反与与众不同。

 

那时的的士高就成了唯一去处，其实初中就有了迪斯科，到了快大学的时候，名字一换，好像对这玩意的理解又不一样了。

震耳欲聋的音乐，再加上些些的酒精，与异性轻搂之间，便觉得象是一个大人了。这也是我看站台和孔雀这两部片深有感触的原因。

 

去南京游山玩水，酒足饭饱之际，借着微微醉意，几个70后的大孩子们，一说起的厅，都有自己的记忆和感触。一致赞成去酒吧街转转。找找青春的尾巴。

 

到了的厅，才发现自己已经是和社会脱节了，坐电脑前倒是自信的很，到了酒吧街，都不知道选哪家，花花绿绿。。

还好，我们一致认为，有钱就行，怎么着，我们也是有为的中年人，正值经济能力高峰。。带着这点自信，我们硬着头皮穿了几家。最后一致选择了一家音乐最响最劲的鱼贯而入。

 

接下来的事，就比较夸张了，人太多，我们都没有办法找到张桌子，有一些美女占了桌子，但明显是在吊人。我们几个都是羞涩的IT青年，要和陌生人搭讪真是比登天还难。那就站着摇吧。。干摇没有意思，在买酒的时候又碰到困难了。。多少钱一瓶不知道那场合都听不清人说话的。。在边上观察半天，最后塞了一百给服务员，让他给酒，一边得意的看着别人，意思是说，大家别担心，有钱就好。。

 

一会儿，小二送了三瓶酒过来，并带找零的10元。。我也没听清他说啥，一把收下。。结果居然不给给我们开盖子，走了人。

思考再三，是我们太落伍了那１０块是小费啊，人家一客气，我们就收下。。当然要给我们这帮土包子一个下马威了。。。

靠。。。我们是土，但还没有土到家。用牙开盖。。一口倒下。。。

大家对视一下，一致同意，走人。。

灰溜溜的，的回咱们的五星酒店。

 

那一晚，我想大家都睡的挺踏实，以后估计不会再有想法搞什么青春尾巴了。嗯，现在已经不是我们的江湖。。我们只需要做好现在该干的事。

结个婚，生个子，每天守着，乖乖在家看电视。

2008年，是一个让人焦虑的一年，从年初开始，国内大事小事不断，物价高涨，股票下跌。国际上次贷危机，油价高涨，铁矿石价格上涨近一倍。人民币升值出口受阻。

在上海考察之时，也发现经济情况的恶化，行业人员趋饱和，人工待遇偏低，房价因素造成人才外流到苏州等地。

从网站来看，各家网站普遍发映今年的广告难做，以往的客户已经没有多少钱投入。

 

所有的这些参考指数都让人恐慌，但还多少不太明朗，因为我向来是太未雨绸缪，几年前就在唱空了，所以抱着点看不准的侥幸。但今天看了马云的内部邮件：冬天会比想像更长，再加上了马化腾，任正非也发准备过冬的信号。看样子，真的要来了，马云可是手握几十亿美金啊还叫成这样。

 

另可见我在年初死抓现金，更换办公场地，大幅节约成本的决策是多么正确。

 

在世界经济衰退时，制造，金融，IT会首当其冲，是危机，必然隐藏机会，抓住这个时间修炼内功，培养员工和团队是最好的办法。虽然现在在紧张的前期，但现在的蓝色理想却是历史上团队人口最庞大的时期，依靠超低的成本，面对冬天一样可以应对自如，按照朋友们的话，你们一直在冬天里过着，什么危机对你们来说，都没啥影响。

 

我的经验看来，互联网行业始终是新兴行业，正在和传统行业密切结合中，行业不会在这场经济衰退中受什么影响，但必然有一场大浪淘沙，经过行业洗牌后，很多中小网站会被淘汰，资源会向少数几个互联网大鳄集中。而少数选择狭缝市场的平台化网站会在挺过冬天后，活的更加滋润。

 

嗯。。焦虑时，写写画画唱唱心情也会好很多。不是吗？地球仍然在转动。

感冒引起肠炎并发，经过几天的药餐，略有好转之，但内心特憋闷。

不想去招呼朋友，晚饭后，迎着夕阳，坐上的士(其实我挺舍不得打的)直奔我的豪宅而去了。。

 

今年房价都在看空，搞的人心惶惶。我这套可是在去年9月进的场子啊。所谓高位接盘。不过，不管怎样，这套是我的自住，所以涨跌与我无关。周边的环境我是最喜欢的，相比上月上海某人的那套联排，我这环境就是好上天了。

 

 

小区就在公园里，傍晚的天气还不算太热，听着钟楼怪人的音乐，沿着湖边大道，信步向未来的房子走去。

路边绿意昂然，不多的游人或坐于湖边，或在跑步锻炼，或全家饭后散步。看着他们欢快的脸，我也很快乐。虽然连续几天没有吃好饭，多少人还是有点轻飘飘，但我喜欢这种虚弱的轻飘，有种不食人间烟火的幻觉。我就这么飘到了小区门口。

 

 

我觉得环境对人的心理作用真的很强，在一个优美的环境里，我怎么都觉得世界是美好的，未来是光明的。完全不觉得2008年是一个不安定的一年。

平时挤在办公室里，就是觉得形势紧张，要省钱花，要再留下运营大半年的资金，还要提高员工待遇....，搞的超郁闷。现在一扫而空了。

 

会所前面的广场有很多小孩子在玩滑板，旱冰。好悠闲。往里走的渔池边上有个小女孩在给锦鲤喂食，鱼儿们密密的抢着，溅得水起，啪啪的响。在落日的阳光下，好静逸。他的家人护着，怕她掉下水。呵呵，这也许就是我以后的生活哦。想起来就想笑。不打扰他们一家了。。我想顺着走到浏阳河大堤看看，湖水都浅了，看看他们是想了啥法子引水。

 

到了公园的边上，发现环园的马路已经修好了。真爽，可以趁人少，在这儿学开车了。徒步爬上大堤，现在的堤好像都比房子要高一点。我估计一下，至少到了二楼的高度。嗯，要是决了堤，我就惨了。我就在二楼，哈哈。

 

堤上风景独好，有轻风，看着轮船开过，水还很清，远处的浏阳河大桥雄壮有力，不知不觉，我已经走了两小时了，天色正晚，刚好听完音乐剧。心情好得很。

撤退，收工，走人。再等上几个月，收房，享受。心里挺美。。发现自己居然也是物质青年。

 

美好的生活，还是那么的令人向往，努力有了结果的感觉，真好。。

哦，忘记说了，买房和月供，我都不用负责。所以没有压力，这点是我比大多数人美的地方。:p

跟用户有关的项目，靠SEO和推广让人知道，再靠UE和功能把人留下。
跟我有关的项目，靠PLMM把我留住。

不知道什么时候开始羡慕起楼下打篮球的小孩子了。每天早早的就到操场。一个暑假下来，素质就提高很多。

而我，每次路过，都只是想想而已，惦着没有做完的事。惦着要照顾的人，有心无力。。这是否就是老了的标志？

人越成熟，要负责的事就越多，要做的事就越多，烦恼也就会越多。

 

回想起当初整年整年的画画，练吉他，玩电脑，学技术。现在看来真的好奢侈啊。小小少年，没有烦恼。

 

成年后，总是喜欢朋友满堂，把酒言欢。是否天称座的人都是这样的性格？

当时就想要挣好多的钱，然后盖一个大房子，朋友们都聚一起，无忧无虑的生活在一起。

 

但现在，钱不太好挣，朋友们也各奔东西。天下没有不散的宴席。

真的不喜欢大家都过着没谱的生活，真的想大家都能快乐的生活，没有忧愁！

 

以前，没有手机的联系手段，朋友们之间，就只有靠信和明信片。每次收到信都格外的高兴。想着朋友们过的怎样了。

现在有了手机，有了QQ，天天在网上见着，也不见得会说上一句。

 

以前翻来复去，就是街坊和同学，不外就那十几个人。偶而串串门就能让生活过的丰富，人们关系紧密。

现在动不动就是几百人在QQ和MSN上蹲着，看着上千的名片，都不知道，这几年是怎么认识这么多人的。

只有在需要的时候，大家才联系下，平时都忙不完的事。

 

有了SNS后，好友们的一串串事件，看的眼花。

 

越来越不喜欢现代的生活。

记得看顾长卫的《孔雀》的时候，看着县城早上各家各户在门口生灶火的炊烟，我都感动的想哭了。

一直不理解，古代为啥有人要隐居。现在我越来越能理解这样的做法。

有所得，必有所失，有所失，必有所得。

这是一个让人伤心的日子，独留下遗憾和叹息，没有一个人会好受。

 

上帝说，关上一扇门，就会打开另一扇门。

但有的门，一旦关上，就永远不会打开了。

 

如果人生，只有一扇门.......

 

啥也别说了，我还是太傻。傻人哪会有傻福，只有身在福中不知福。

 

The Fringe Benefits of Failure, and the Importance of Imagination

她回忆了自己大学毕业的情景：

I was convinced that the only thing I wanted to do, ever, was to write novels. However, my parents, both of whom came from impoverished backgrounds and neither of whom had been to college, took the view that my overactive imagination was an amusing personal quirk that could never pay a mortgage, or secure a pension.

They had hoped that I would take a vocational degree; I wanted to study English Literature. A compromise was reached that in retrospect satisfied nobody, and I went up to study Modern Languages. Hardly had my parents' car rounded the corner at the end of the road than I ditched German and scuttled off down the Classics corridor

I cannot remember telling my parents that I was studying Classics; they might well have found out for the first time on graduation day. Of all subjects on this planet, I think they would have been hard put to name one less useful than Greek mythology when it came to securing the keys to an executive bathroom.

I would like to make it clear, in parenthesis, that I do not blame my parents for their point of view. ... I cannot criticise my parents for hoping that I would never experience poverty. They had been poor themselves, and I have since been poor, and I quite agree with them that it is not an ennobling experience. Poverty entails fear, and stress, and sometimes depression; it means a thousand petty humiliations and hardships. Climbing out of poverty by your own efforts, that is indeed something on which to pride yourself, but poverty itself is romanticised only by fools.

接着，她谈到了自己那些最悲惨的日子：

A mere seven years after my graduation day, I had failed on an epic scale.

An exceptionally short-lived marriage had imploded, and I was jobless, a lone parent, and as poor as it is possible to be in modern Britain, without being homeless. The fears my parents had had for me, and that I had had for myself, had both come to pass, and by every usual standard, I was the biggest failure I knew.

That period of my life was a dark one. I had no idea how far the tunnel extended, and for a long time, any light at the end of it was a hope rather than a reality.

那段日子是我生命中的黑暗岁月。我不知道还要在黑暗中走多久，很长一段时间中，我有的只是希望，而不是现实。

So why do I talk about the benefits of failure? Simply because failure meant a stripping away of the inessential. I stopped pretending to myself that I was anything other than what I was, and began to direct all my energy into finishing the only work that mattered to me.

Had I really succeeded at anything else, I might never have found the determination to succeed in the one arena I believed I truly belonged.

I was set free, because my greatest fear had already been realised, and I was still alive, and I still had a daughter whom I adored, and I had an old typewriter and a big idea. And so rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.

Failure gave me an inner security that I had never attained by passing examinations. Failure taught me things about myself that I could have learned no other way. I discovered that I had a strong will, and more discipline than I had suspected; I also found out that I had friends whose value was truly above rubies.

You will never truly know yourself, or the strength of your relationships, until both have been tested by adversity. Such knowledge is a true gift, for all that it is painfully won, and it has been worth more to me than any qualification I ever earned.

结尾部分。

the fact that you are graduating from Harvard suggests that you are not very well-acquainted with failure. You might be driven by a fear of failure quite as much as a desire for success. Indeed, your conception of failure might not be too far from the average person's idea of success, so high have you already flown academically.

But how much more are you, Harvard graduates of 2008, likely to touch other people's lives? Your intelligence, your capacity for hard work, the education you have earned and received, give you unique status, and unique responsibilities....... That is your privilege, and your burden.

If you choose to use your status and influence to raise your voice on behalf of those who have no voice; if you choose to identify not only with the powerful, but with the powerless; if you retain the ability to imagine yourself into the lives of those who do not have your advantages, then it will not only be your proud families who celebrate your existence, but thousands and millions of people whose reality you have helped transform for the better.

We do not need magic to change the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves already: we have the power to imagine better.

我们不需要改变世界的魔法，我们自己的体内就有这样的力量：那就是我们一直在梦想，让这个世界变得更美好。